Tuesday, July 29, 2008

This is how I like my Maniston

Plain. Greasy. Tired. Desperate. Boring. All this and more as she waits for her toyboy Mayer during his concert.

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Diane Keaton this girl ain't

I don't know what exactly Mischa's going for. Perhaps a mix of Diane Keaton meets Julia Roberts in Steel Magnolias sprinkled with a helluva lot of depareration at a down-the-gurgler film career. I'm concerned about the whole gettup, including the southern-tramp top, the baggy white pants and the crispy hair.

It's like Jessica Simpson on Ritalin...which I need not iterate...is.bad.

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Soft Spot

I've got a big soft spot for this chicka. Hermoine Granger aka Emma Watson, at the Cartier Polo.

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I know how you feel Chris

...honestly. I'd look a lot worse if I had to wake up to the nightmare that is G-whine-th as well...
Chris is perfomoring in the 2008 Pemberton Music Festival in British Columbia. Hmm.

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OMG - Non-Feral Britney Alert

BritBrit is currently in Mexico...working...and by working I mean knuckle bumps washed down with Coronas.

Girlfriend is looking mildly fierce...and the fact that she's rather far away helps as well I take it.
Still credit where credit's due.

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Monday, July 28, 2008

Child Services - Anyone...ANYONE?!?

Honestly. Someone get his son away. Pete inhales so much crack that just being within 100m radius is enough to put you in a drug-induced coma. Barbiturates seep from his pores.
This is Doherty spending daddy time with his son Astile.

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Can anyone say Joceyn Wildenstein?

What on earth has Madonna done to her cheeks? Girlfriend needs to stop sipping the Kabbalah juice and steroids and get on a different bandwagon. Girlfriend is looking like a haggard version of Jocelyn...and that's saying something.

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This is PRECISELY what happens when you start hanging out too much with G-whine-th Paltrow, like she did last week...look what it did to Coldplay and Estee Lauder.

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...and the beauty that is Jocelyn...for illustrative purposes...and kicks.

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Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Armani is Voldemort is Armani?

This picture is not doctored....his Lordship is 75...and looking like...he's rather hungry for my soul.

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Voldemort [from HPotter]

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Sunday, July 20, 2008

Because you can never have enough Vintage Britney

For the weekend. For kicks. For laughs. For tears. For fears.

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Reese is Fierce

Girlfriend is getting her photo taken by the great Steven Miesel for Vogue. I know she's supposed to be a total cow in real life but I've got a huge soft spot for her...just like the rest of America.

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Helen Mirren is hotness

...honestly. That woman has a much better bod than I do...and she's around 40 years older than me! If it's natural then I hate her --> if it's surgery then I want her surgeon!!!

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Thursday, July 17, 2008

Monday, July 14, 2008

Our Saviours have arrived!

I thought the second coming would never be --> but alas, it has occured.
Vivienne Marcheline and Knox Leon Jolie-Pitt have come to earth...and French Moses [aka Mayor Christian Estrosi of Nice, France] held the brith certificates as if they were the missing 11th and 12th commandments.

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Sunday, July 13, 2008

US Kath and Kim looks....BAD

OMG...this looks awful!
I don't know why Americans feel the need to US-ify perfectly good comedies such as the Office and Kath and Kim...simply because their accents are different!

This is a butchering of Aussie show. The very funny Kath and Kim...*shudders*



The original

The Ideal

I'm not exactly sure who Shauna Sand is - or why she's mildly-famous. But anyone that can look more like a blow-up doll than a blow-up doll, deserves my kudos...and eternal admiration.

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Thursday, July 10, 2008

Granny Spears or Posh Spice?

It's so difficult to tell these two apart these days! Both of them of course - being supremely beautiful...and toasty!

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Ethan Downgrades

Let me preface this by saying that I really don't like Ethan. Man.is.a.rat.

Well - the Kurt-Cobain-grunge-greasy-wannabe has finally married the nanny he left Uma Thurman for: Ryan Shawhughes, Ryan is currently knocked up.

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Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Granny drops the kids at the airport

sweet. Honestly. I'd love to look like that at 75.

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Franken-stomach is back!

What beautiful beaded accessories Tara uses to accentuate the luscious ripples and cavernous delights of her stomach. Simple. Elegant. Timeless.

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Random Kinky Stuff

...nice huh?

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thanks Ben

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Smart Water is NOT Burberry!!!

Honestly. They've got to stop peddling this like some kind of beautiful Hampton-esque luxury product. Bad.

"I love the reflection of water...but what I drink is a reflection of me" WTF? Honestly, I'd rather go to bloody Crazy Hathaway's psychic masseuse than drink anything endorsed by Maniston.

Maniston could be photoshopped to high heaven but could never even aspire to be a poor man's Kate Moss. Couldn't even be her toenail.

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I love it when they forget to attach the head properly

*sigh* - looks like marriage for Mimi still hasn't helped her out much. She's been run through the photoshop editing room....thrice. And by thrice I mean her head was lopped off and attached to a tall slim person.

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blue eyes...of course!

Dirty Dress and Bird-Emphasisng makeup

...surely her convict [ex]boyfriend could have arranged something better for her? Girlfriend is pimping the new Get Smart movie in Rome.
She's apparently also a fan some crazy psychic masseuse who gives her incredible pearls of wisdom such as: "love is the only action. Everything else is reaction"...probably while she mentally massages Anne's wallet. Well, I don't know about you...but consider me a new client!

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Douche Madden and his Tranny Hilton are still in love

...warms the cockles of my heart. Honestly. Reminds of the butterflies in my stomach a few years ago when Paris announced she was engaged.
Kids are in Vegas.


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Agyness Deyn tries her hand at DJ-ing

...you all know I think she's hella cool.
This is just an excuse to post some pics of her.
She's also going out with someone from the Strokes -- is gorgeous, has white hair -- is my age -- and I don't believe has ever office-jobbed in her life -- all of which makes me vaguely jealous.
She's here guest DJ-ing in NY at Plumm

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