Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Jennifer Aniston bores everyone to tears on Oprah

I haven't seen this...but I can just imagine the insufferability of it. Basically Jen wah wah wahhing while simultaneously telling people to move on and not to worry about her...that's she's surviving just great, and that she's not a sterile ditz...in fact...she wants to have a litter of kids Vince! Oh! and not to forget to watch her lame-ass movies. This is all while Oprah tells her she's amazing, super talented, gorgeous, strong, is an inspiration to all-jilted women, and that her nose really isn't a mess. The audience then "awws" and cheers oh-so-loudly because they just can't believe that this heroine has survived all that hardship...I'm pretty sure it finishes off with Oprah and Jennifer "finding their spirit" and re-aligning their chakrah over a glass of no-calorie non-alcoholic champagne.


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Am I near the mark?

24 comments:

Elisita said...

yeah...I remember when she said that she was going to retire on 2000 or something (when Ricki Lake and Jerry Springer were popular)...but she's stayed on. She's the biggest suck up...the interviews are so boring...well...except when you get crazy nutcases on...and I HATE that "Find Your Spirit" segment...sucks.
love,
elisa

Anonymous said...

I don't get people who don't like Oprah.

She does celebrity interviews to get ratings, but she also helps the less fortunate and enlightens her viewers on social issues they wouldn't otherwise know about . If you can still hate on Oprah after her Hurricane Katrina expose, you are Satan.

But then again, I guess if Janice Dick-In-Her-Mouth is your hero, social issues and helping others isn't a priority.

Anonymous said...

I prefer to stay out of this debate on who's who -
I'd rather comment on a quite natural (?), feminine (?) feature of quite many people, including J.A. as well...She wants to get sympathy by making everyone feel how much she suffers, but at the same time wants to be adored by everyone about how much she endures. Kind of unrealistic anticipation, but works for so many people...

Unknown Soldier said...

Oprah is boring, that is one thing.

Oprah is an excellent person, that is another thing.

Please don't mix.

We are thalking about her job, not her charity.


I am not Satan

Michael K said...

God, she's so vanilla. Aniston really needs to edge herself up. Get a drug problem or something.

Anonymous said...

I LOVE Janice Dickinson. And I HATE Oprah. One's real and the other's disgustingly full of herself and thinks she's better'n God. I also love WWJDD, so don't mess wit her, hater.

Jack B. said...

I feel so bad for Jen. Yeah, it so hard to be rich and famous. Who would want a life like that?

Sami said...

Can someone please shoot Jennifer Aniston? Please? "Oh, Brad left me" *whine* "for another woman" *whine* "Look at me, I'm a survivor" *preen* "I'm moving on" *preen* "But my man left me for another woman!" *whine*

Here, Jen, have some cheese. Seriously. You want to bring to life the pain and suffering of a breakup. Boo hoo, I cry. Really. No, really, cos right now I'm chopping onions so I can cry with you. No sympathy, toots. While the rest of America's women actually do experience the painful heartache of a breakup, you can have a team of psychologists, spending sprees, or whatever.

So please, eat the cheese, drink the whine because we're tired of it. And most of us don't care. Let people focus on more pressing issues, such as Tess Smith's dress. Poor thing was attacked by ravenous, angry, hungry wolves... oh wait, she meant to wear that...

Sami said...

And for the record, Janice Dickinson is the bomb diggity.

Anonymous said...

and dont let her trick you into thinking she gave them those cars because she didnt. Pontiac did. They wanted free advertising for their 'new' G6 that looks like every other pontiac sold in the last 10 years. and if you look at pontiac sales records the gimmick obviously worked. i hope oprah dies.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't care less about Jennifer Aniston's problems. She has f**ked Brad Pitt (in the past) and has millions upon millions of dollars. That in itself could make any normal woman happy for the rest of her life. Who cares if she's ugly and not really that talented, she could still get any normal guy she wanted. Plus she could buy herself like 30 houses. So I really don't want to hear about her "problems".

Anonymous said...

Wow, compared to the thousands of women who get beaten, cheated on, left penniless to raise children on their own, my heart really goes out to poor Jen. Where did my tiny violin go?

Anonymous said...

Yikes, does everyone have PMS today, or what?

Anonymous said...

I really do love Janice Dickinson. I love America's Next Top Model, which is where I found Janice. I identify very much with the way she acts over the top to deal with stuff inside.

I also like Jennifer Aniston. The pain of being left for someone like Angelina would be horrible.

I still hate Oprah, don't know if I mentioned that.

Elisita said...

haha...nothing like a bit of Jennifer 'whine' (I like that sami)to get people talking :) I have to say...Janice Dickinson (and WWJDD) beat Oprah anyday :)
love,
elisa

Clare said...

Aside from the fact I am founder member of Angelina For Queen society I have to say that Jen is doing this for publicity.. she has four movies out this year in which I bet $1000 she will play Rachel in every role. That aside I find this whole laundrying of her private life hyprocritical and crass.

Oprah is the American Dream but her celebrity shows are boring. The rest of this show was about her getting three puppies. Awesome.

Anonymous said...

These were some of the most entertaining comments. I enjoyed all of them. It is understandable that Oprah would sympathize with Jen (yes, it sucks when your husband leaves you, but she not the first or last to be dumped). After all, Oprah had that "most humiliating moment of her life" when Hermes refused her after-hours admittance. I would say Oprah has definitely has had her share of hardships, too.

Anonymous said...

I am so sick of Jennifer Aniston and her playing the sympathy card over her divorce. For someone who harks on about privacy I find it amazing that she chose to speak to

1. Vanity Fair
2. Diane Sawyer
3. Oprah show.

about her divorce. What has Jolie been doing all this time? She visits an African village to highlight extreme poverty - and tries her hand at carrying water on her head.

Aniston on Oprah is so boring she doesnt even get the whole hour and is using public sympathy over her divorce to make people go to her movies. Lame.

Anonymous said...

I'm not bothered about JA. I usually like her, but not during this "tragic" time in her life. Her and Brad's vows were something like: "We promise to try and see how long this thing last for". Huh??? I can't feel much sympathy for a woman who accepts those vows and winds up surprised!

Oprah on the other hand makes me want to vomit. Urrggghh. See Oprah writing out a cheque in front of a massive audience. See Oprah filming herself admist the Hurricane victims. See Oprah charge American housewives and working class mothers hundreds of dollars to see her 'tour'. She has got to be the worst when it comes to self-serving, cynical, manipulative, celebrity using scum!

Anonymous said...

I'm sure that Aniston is in pain. Duh, she was married and he dumped her for someone else, plus she was married to THEE Brad Pitt. But does she not realize that society doesn't want to hear about it. She's richer then most people, and she had him longer then 99.9% of society will have him, so shut up!!! Go buy something and move on! Plus it was Anelina Jolie, hello, my gf would dump me to be with her and I would dump my gf to be with her. This is expected, it's ANGELINA JOLIE!

Elisita said...

yeah Oprah is scary IMO...who is her target market??? It sure ain't us :) Agrred Veggie!
love,
elisa

Anonymous said...

Quit dissing on Jennifer Aniston. I think she is great, it's nice to have a woman in the spotlight who is so "vanilla". She has movies to talk about and you know that EVERY talk show host is going to probe her on the divorce. Duh, it brings in ratings so hateful people like yourselves can diss her. Why shouldn't she speak about it? Precious Brad hasn't had to speak, he has done fine with his actions, proving to the world just what a cad he is.

Ms. Mika said...

I can't believe some of these comments! 1st off I'm going 2 rebuke in the name of Jesus that anything bad happens to Oprah--or anyone 4 that matter!

2ndly, if any1 can remember JA didn't want to and didn't talk about her personal life for mths and mths! Every1 kept asking her to comment maybe it would help her in her transition, blah, blah, blah. But now she's at the point of 'acceptance' we want her to shut-up. As a woman--no as a PERSON that's been hurt more x's than I care 2 admit, it does help to talk about it. Stop focusing on the fact that she has money--none and I mean NONE of it can or will mend her heart. We as common everyday people don't have our personal business in the lime light for all to see--no. We're allowed our privacy. But celebrities--not saying that their any better any of us--because they're not, we're all the same...children of God. But back 2 my point, she doesn't have the luxury of walking down the street and ponder what she could have done differently, etc. without someone walking up to her saying, "Oh JA, I'm sorry 'bout your break-up!" Although it maybe very heartfelt and sincere, it's a personal issue and there's no moment of peace. On the other hand, yes she could go2 any department store and purchase millions on whatever...but what makes us the same...is once that temporary "high" is gone...we're left with that same heartache...

Sorry, 'but tangent...but sometimes, people forget that we're all just PEOPLE...rich or poor...we all hurt the same.

Anonymous said...

enjoyed it and I will be adding it to my favorites. I have a really cool